Resilience

I have lived with mental illness symptoms since I was a small child. I recognized that I heard voices when I was 12 and learned that I had schizophrenia after reading a TIME magazine article when I was 17. I was diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder bipolar type II 17 years ago when I was 39 after committing crimes and harming others. I take a fair amount of medication and still struggle with self-hate. The most important lessons for me revolve around my resilience, my good response to treatment and my support from family and friends. Although I have been incarcerated and unable to work for several years I am more fortunate than many others I know who live with mental illness. I am now employed full-time at a job I've had for more than 2 years and I have learned a lot about self-care during the past 17 years. I kept this blog for a couple of years about 9 or 10 years ago and I'm starting it again now to pass on some of what I've learned. I've made so many mistakes and hurt so many people that I am often paralyzed by guilt, regret and envy. Let's see where this phase of my journey takes me.